That awkward moment when you realise how different you are...

Hey! Yeah, you, I'm talking to YOU!

You ever get that feeling where you just think: "Damn... I bet I'm the only person in the world that's this weird" ? Well, I had that feeling today where after fixing my stepdad's car, then fixing his airsoft gun, I randomly ordered a friking pizza, ate the entire thing by myself and then proceeded to use the box as a target for that gun to test it.

Then I drank a coke can, and proceeded to use the leftover cardboard of the pizzabox to make sort of a silhouette and used the empty coke can as a head. I then practiced my headshots.

What should creep me out more: that entire situation, or the fact that I'm still just as good with a gun as half a year ago without any practice? I love guns. It may sound weird, but I just really do. There's 3 things I enjoy in the world: music, romance and weapons. As a thing seperately, that's normal, I guess. The combination however, I'm not sure, feel free to comment on that.


When my stepdad's car got fixed, he asked me to test if it worked. You should've seen the expression on his face when I drifted it around a corner to "test" it. Lol, he wanted to kill me. That is, until I reminded him that I just pretty much fixed his car by myself. And pushed it, a lot. Jumper cables not available, so I had to push the goddamn Mercedes 220 myself.

My hobbies are awesome. Those typical things that keep you happy. Gotta find me a new romance though. Maybe one where I don't get too attached? The last one ended up becoming a still lasting disaster. So for now, my plan is: working out 5 days a week in the gym (anti-stress) and trying to get a gun to practice.

So until next time, stay tuned,
Bender

P.S.: This picture = my type of thinking.



If you don't get it: snipers hold their breath when they shoot.

Mentors

So, lately I've been thinking a lot about some old friends, that I haven't seen in forever. I've also been thinking about every single person that taught me something important. It's quite a huge list, if you think about it. A random stranger on the street that taught you to follow the law, a person in the supermarket who taught you to be happy with what you have, etc...

I had the extreme luck of meeting a friend of mine who was my best friend for about 6-7 years in elementary school again. It was great seeing him again. Last I heard of him, he was going through a really rough time. I'd go further into it, but let's put it this way: life just wasn't being nice to him for once. Like, he got really screwed over. The last 2 months or so, I can't help but think of a friend of mine, that died this year, in April. If I had to chose one person who taught me the most, it would be him, without a doubt. This guy was the best person I've ever met. He had it all: wife, kid, job, dreams. This was a guy to look up to. He did exactly what I want to do later: he was a soldier. He was probably the greatest guy I've ever met.


You know that person who teaches you those little skills that are really cool, pointless to many but so fucking cool for you and only you? That person who teaches you valuable lessons in life. Well, to me, that was him.
He pretty much taught me how to live. He didn't just teach me cool little tricks, he also taught me morals, that every man should strive to live for. Always go after what you want, persue your dreams, never give up, be greatful, love everyone around you. Live like each day is your last. Never regret a decision.

"Put all your bad memories and habits in a box, and carry that with you each day, to remind you what the good way is." he used to say, whenever I screwed up (lol one of those billions of times), and I thought it was bullshit at first. When I lost my friend, I realised he was right. I started living with all those things with me. Guess what? It helps. It made that each and every move was something I had thought through, very very very well.

There's a lot of things I wish I could've done with him before he died... Things we had planned for when he was supposed to come back from Afghanistan: fishing was one, camping another, he was going to teach me how to drive his way (which means agressive as fuck manouevres all the time), some more self-defense classes, etc... But also the little things: talking randomly all night with a drink, chilling with the group, going to the rifle range and getting some gun practice, ...

I miss him. I ain't gonna lie. I'm not looking for pity or anyone feeling sorry for me. Fuck that, I don't want or need that. I just need to clear my mind here.
To think I talked to him on the phone a week before I got the news that he died, and was told things like "I'll be back soon, man, we're almost done here." is just sad. I spent a great deal of time being mad at everyone, but mainly at God. Wondering why he was so cruel to take away my best friend...Now, I'm not mad anymore. I still miss him, but I got over most of my anger. That's a shout out for everyone that has a fight with their bff but in reality wants to be friends again: get it solved, she/he may not be there tomorrow.

If I had to describe my friend in one word, I'd say: mentor. Truth is, one word isn't enough. It's missing things like: brother, friend, teacher, great husband to his wife, great father to his kid, etc...

This one's dedicated to you buddy, godspeed.



Til' next time peeps :)
Bender

So.. Long time no see?

Wow, I just realised I haven't been on this blog ever since March... God, I'm either really lazy or I ain't got anything interesting to say. A lot's happened since then, lemme see.. Some stupid bitch, school, stupid bitch again, school, somehow the stupid bitch AGAIN (seriously, don't you ever take a fucking day off, you slut?) and that's about it...

Nope, nothing interesting there, lol. One thing I did love though was a teambuilding activity with my class Thursday... It was awesome. Most of the people in that class I either didn't know at all, or barely, except for a few really cool friends I've known for longer. Teambuilding did it's job, I must say.

So I've been working on getting back in contact with some old friends (like from waaaaay before). There was this guy who taught me self - defense once, but he ain't arround anymore... I've been trying to get back into self - defense. One tip, if you ever try to practice this stuff, not at home, seriously. I got dents in my wall now, pain in my knuckles and a really fucked up closet door. Accidents happen lol.

Oh, and I took the advice of a friend of mine to try and contact my first girlfriend, who was into witchcraft, because my friend thinks she cursed me. (would explain a lot)
I talked to her dad and suddenly remembered a little thingy, just a tiny detail: the dude is a motherfucking psychopath. Like, seriously. I just remembered how once some dude pissed him off, and he was found dead in the woods like a month later. Nope, not the guy to ask. Lol, and if I do, I'll probably be found on the bottom of a river with this funny as fuck facial expression.


I'll try to update the blog more often, although I'll be moving soon (fuck, again). I think it'll actually have benefits for once, as my current place just has bad memories all over...

Keep your head high, but not so high that it hits the ceiling fan. Seriously, that shit's dangerous.

I'll get back to enjoying my weekend now. And sleep, I like sleep.



Here's a pic of a monkey trying to make out with a cat.













And if you're not into that kinda stuff, here's a pic of a really shit scared guy.



So untill next time.
Peace out,
Bender